For when your feeling a little philosophical about life ....

The journey of a thousand kilometers 
begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tyre (or a blown clutch).

I believe for every drop of rain that falls a flower grows,
and a foundation leaks and a cricket game gets rained out and a car rusts
and... 

Always take time to stop and smell the roses
and sooner or later, you'll inhale a bee. 

Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. 
Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow.    
Do not walk beside me, either, just leave me alone. 

If a motorist cuts you off, just turn the other cheek.    
Nothing gets the message across like a good mooning. 

When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle.   
It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself. 

It's always darkest before dawn.   
So if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do
it. 

Each day I try to enjoy something from each of the four food groups: 
the bonbon group, the salty-snack group, the caffeine group, and the
"whatever-the-thing-in-the-tinfoil-in-the-back-of-the-fridge-is" group. 

It's a small world. 
So you got to use your elbows a lot. 

Keep your nose to the grindstone and your shoulder to the wheel.
It's cheaper than plastic surgery. 

This land is your land.  
This land is my land.  
So stay on your land. 

Love is like a roller coaster: 
when it's good you don't want to get off, and when it isn't you can't wait
to throw up.